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Saturday, December 1, 2012

A Raw Honest Cursing Prayer



Tears cascade down like an open flood gate
its more than I can handle, its more than I can take
Why did you make me, Lord,  if I'm gonna be in pain
what would that accomplish, what would that gain?

Just rip my heart out, rip it out now
I'm tired of this livin', and figurin' out how
outside I look like 40, inside only 10
when you gonna take it, tell me when, fuckin' when?

Now I don't mean no disrespect, but Lord, what the fuck?
It takes all I have not to step in front a truck
I know it ain't your fault, I don't mean to scream and shout,
but I look at that gun and wanna blow my brains out. 

I'm yellin' at you Lord, cause you're all that I've got
who can see my insides and my heart in such a knot
I'm beggin' for your mercy, for your grace to face the day
But I really gotta ask, why you let me be made this way?

Maybe there's a higher purpose, or its only in my dreams
to make it more bearable, the reasons for my screams
whatever it is, it hurts and feels like fuckin' hell
makes me want to bid the world a final big farewell.

But I made it to the mornin' time, didn't think I'd see the sun
but its easier now today, cause daddy's got the gun
and mom stood watch over me all night and in to day
and she waited until she knew that I would be okay.

And I know that even now, Lord, they pray for me tonight
that my heart will heal again, that my soul will be alright
and I know that it will be, cause it always has before
but please, Lord, let me rest, cause I'm really mighty sore.

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