I Miss....

I miss
feeling like I am somebody
I miss
my asian family
I miss
hearing spanish, tagalog, chinese, farsi
I miss
my wife
I miss
being almost normal
I miss
being able to go somewhere without being afraid
I miss
feeling alive
I miss
hearing mariachi music
I miss
watching comedies in a foreign language
I miss
feeling a part of something
I miss
the asian store
I miss
being close to someone
I miss
being self reliant
I miss
supporting myself
I miss
feeling sane
I miss
having the passion to be alive
I miss
feeling like I could accomplish anything if I tried
I miss
feeling like there is always hope
I miss
the thought that we would grow old together
I miss
adobo and sinagong
I miss
being able to go to the thai restaurant and not be afraid
I miss
feeling like life is worth fighting for
I miss
feeling like people gave a shit about what I had to say
I miss
feeling like everything is going to be okay
I miss
having a weird hillbilly/asian accent
I miss
having confidence
I miss
thinking anything was possible
I miss
thinking my story would end well
I miss
having the passion to make the world a better place
I miss
feeling like I had more than my parents to hang on to
I miss
feeling like I had something to contribute
I miss
the illusion that people I never met but talk to online everyday were like family
I miss
sitting on the 10 freeway
I miss
thinking going to college meant I would be successful
I miss
walking in the dark on a CA night
I miss
watching the newspaper guy deliver the LA times in the early morning
I miss
singing gospel songs as the sun went down over TN with my wife
I miss
the ducks that came to visit us
I miss
our anaks that have passed on
I miss
the way you tilted your head and smiled
I miss
Sarsi
I miss
those little fish crackers we used to share with a Sarsi
I miss
watching Wowowee with you while I ate adobo and you had fish
I miss
hearing you laugh
I miss
thinking I would never lose you
I miss
not feeling like a burden
I miss
not knowing what its like when your world crumbles
I miss
the simple joy of looking under rocks for crawdads
I miss
thinking there was a God to make everything better
I miss
the innocence of simple faith
I miss
being 29 and falling in love with you
I miss
thinking I would take care of my parents instead of my parents taking care of me
I miss
believing in myself
I miss
having the energy to fight
I miss
a lot.