Please Momma, Don't Let Go

*Momma=God/dess

Embrace me sweet Mother

sing your child to sleep

let the rhythm of your breathing

slow my heartbeat.

Let the surge of panic lessen

let the sadness break its chains

let me find some peace and love 

in the life that still remains. 

But Momma I gotta tell you

there are days that I can't feel 

and sometimes those are better

because it hurts too much to heal

I'd like to feel and be alive

I  knew that once before

and there are times, sweet Mother, I'll tell you

It makes me desire some more. 

But you know me best of all

when I feel, it is immensely

whether it is anger or its love

I do it so intensely. 

In my insanity I am powerful

in my gentleness I am divine

in my anger, a wounded child

this broken soul of mine. 

But Momma, you never left me

 I didn't even know you were there

no one told me I wasn't a spiritual bastard

that I had a divine momma some where. 

They just made me afraid of Father

said he made hell for people like me

and the only way he would love

was if I was someone I couldn't be.

So I'm just so fucked up Momma

I ain't right in the head

Sometimes I wonder if it all be better

If I would just wake up dead. 

But I don't want them to win

it would make them too happy just to see

another queer swinging round and round

from a rope on a tree. 

So Momma if you would, I'm begging

I'm praying with all I got

Hold me until I'm strong enough

to get up from this spot. 

I know I"m bruised and battered

the scars are ugly, I know

but please Momma until I'm ready

Please Momma, don't let go.